One by one, we experienced the inevitable growth into a new world. We were introduced to war and broken hearts. Some built invisible ice castles around their fears, and others grew hearts even colder. Spilt milk did not cause tears, but secondhand smoke did. Adulthood arrived, and there was to be an endless battle between tragedy and beauty, to the point that both would merge and soon everything would be a bit of both. We were all beautiful tragedies, alive and lonely.
x
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This is old, but I thought it relevant, right now. I've had one of those mornings where you realise how you've changed - how younger selves are tucked away, and how events have changed you [made you stronger]. Am I who I hoped I would become?
ReplyDeleteTurning sixteen, by the way, did not evoke any sort of transformation into a ~moody angsty teenager~ accompanied with all those ~dramas~ as shown in the media/TV series. Sadly, I am still just as boring and just as inept at rebelling against rules.
Don't quite know why I'm still here; but know that I send you my love and that I hope you are indeed happy. xxxx
I've missed your words.
ReplyDeleteyou have the sweetest, loveliest words strung together in this post. <3 you are such a brilliant sixteen-year-old. xxx
ReplyDelete16 is still pretty young :) stay a child at heart and hopefully you won't lose yourself.
ReplyDeleteThere's nothing wrong with not rebelling. Rebel for the things you believe in? not for the sake of rebelling XD
and happy happy belated birthday <3
and sometimes, at least to me, it feels as though i am still that way.
ReplyDeletei hope that you, dear athena, are also happy, xo
I send you all my love, too. What you have written is very true. That feeling of, when you start growing up, even the simplest things suddenly become harder. But I believe it gets easier as time goes on. Wishing you all the best, xxxx
ReplyDeleteI have missed your words so much, I love: 'we are all beautiful tragedys' it is so true, you seem much like me in the angsty teenage world (non existant) xxx
ReplyDeleteHow time and time again the world pushes you to that room wherein all adult things are shelved and stored in a jar and you are given the job to arrange all of them, open all the jars, work on every dust, box the dolls and burn the older journals of childhood.
ReplyDeleteI miss you Athena.
I am trying to live and grow up (as much as I dislike it) so you must hang on and do the same. x
athena
ReplyDeleteyour words always make me cry, always always--
i've sent you an email, please read it and if you have time, respond
xxxx
angelica
"Spilt milk did not cause tears, but secondhand smoke did." Awww, beautiful.
ReplyDeleteI just turned 23 myself, and I don't feel much different either. So I'd say that it's not only normal, but a good thing, to have a relatively calm birthday. Who needs drama anyway? Haha,
you're beautiful.
ReplyDeleteoh, lovely, you and i both <3
ReplyDeleteAnd I am glad that you are still here. This writing is so poignant.
ReplyDeleteaw thanks so much lovely for following my blog! :) i'm now following yours as well :). wow your writing is flawless and beautiful. <3
ReplyDelete<3, Kathleen.
We were all beautiful tragedies, alive and lonely.
ReplyDeleteoh my god, you make my life, seriously. i love how much of yourself you pour out into your work, eugh. it's fascinating and lovely.
happy birthday, i'm going to turn 16 too soon, which is crazy.
xoxo scarzz
your words are always so poignant! xx
ReplyDeletethis is so beautiful. write again soon!
ReplyDeletethe opposite idea has occurred to me
ReplyDeletewe are very much children
the older you are, the more years you've collected of youth.
each year i dont think you become a new person, instead i think you begin a new layer, but you never shed who you used to be, you use who you used to be as a platform for creating who you're becoming.
that way, a woman of a hundred is a woman of one and two and fourteen and eighty, etc. she still does, thinks, acts in ways she did when she was born.
it's all a very confusing thought that i probably should explore more, i hope it made some sense as im' not the best at making sense.